Sardonic Aggression

Weather or Not: A Lame (But True) Metaphor for Life

When I was seven I was living in a house on Hope Street in Huntington Park, California with my mom, dad, my brother and two sisters. We were a pretty typical family unit, and if it wasn't idyllic, as I remember it, things were mostly okay.

One afternoon on a rainy day after school, I looked out our front window, and the rainstorm which had been pelting southern California for a couple of days was in the process of breaking up. The instability of the air above us had produced a curious scene, something I've not encountered since.

Rain was falling on almost exactly half of our house - while the other side had sunshine and was relatively dry. I asked my mom if I could go outside. She said no, and I put on a jacket and did it anyway (things are not much different from that today, much to my mom's chagrin. I'm responsible for more than my share of the gray hairs on her head.) The rain continued to sprinkle on half of our lot, while the other side was aglow with the sunshine drying the pavement. This went on for a good five minutes, and I stood there the whole time, watching and wondering which way the weather would turn.

Eventually the stormy half blew out, the sky opened up with brightly illuminated clouds, a powder blue sky, and a couple of partial-rainbows formed as the rain moved away. Too young to see this as any kind of a sign, I was just happy the rain was going away so I could go out and play. But in the movie of my life, it would have been the irony-laced opening scene - In less than two years my dad would bail out on us, we'd have to move, and things were anything but typical after that.

I've stood on that border of dark and light ever since - I battle a darkly cynical streak, counterbalanced with an almost Pollyanna-like naivete that things will somehow work out - and I hang on for dear life as I ride the pendulum back and forth between these two places in my head.

Here on the cusp of 2011, I might as well be standing in that yard watching the elements again - half a dark sky and half a gateway to heaven stand before all of us, and I've decided I'm going with the bright side - something which hasn't always been that easy for me. But fueled with the love and support of a wife who's better for me than I possibly deserve, and a son whose growing intellect (and wicked sense of humor) are a joy to watch everyday, I can see the way to go. Add to that friends and family who know what a odd bird I am and still agree to talk to me, well, I've got a list of blessings too long to count.

The dark and cloudy side is still with me - I think maybe it keeps me from getting complacent - it comes and goes. But now I know that eventually it'll blow away.

Merry Christmas. Happy New Year.
And as the man said, let's make it a good one...